I’ll just have one or maybe two I can drink just one more day then stop, I’ll just smoke marijuana that’s not that bad, or I’ll only drink on the weekends, etc. such a persistent idea, desire, emotion, etc., especially one that cannot be gotten rid of by reasoning. Obsession is defined as a fact or state of being obsessed with an idea, desire, emotion, etc. “The idea that somehow, someday he will control and enjoy his drinking is the great obsession of every abnormal drinker.” (Big Book, ) We’re powerless when our mind is obsessing, so it’s nearly impossible to make the right decision. Yet we tip the scale in the wrong direction. We have had at least one good reason, probably more. It makes so much sense when we look back at our behaviors-the threat of relationships ending, poor health, work-life, bad decisions, legal trouble, etc. This understanding of the word obsession explains why we keep going back to pick up the first drink or drug. We’ve had good reasons to quit for good, and we continued drinking or using drugs anyway. How many times have we done this, and how did that work out? Isn’t that a contradiction to being powerless and having no choice! Why would we choose to do something or try to prevent something from happening if we understood we were powerless? We wouldn’t! “Our sound reasoning failed to hold us in check. When we make a choice not to pick up the first one, we are assuming at the moment that we have the power to do that. Isn’t that just as insane if we understood powerless? Yet how many of us just tried to stop or control our drinking. Some of those waves would probably knock us down, and some would cause us physical harm or even death as the storm got worse. There is no way we could prevent the wave from rolling over us and onto the shore. No matter how hard we could try, we know we would never accomplish such a foolish idea. Have you ever gone to the beach during a storm and tried to stop a wave from coming ashore? I doubt it! Why? Because we’re sane enough to know that we don’t have the power to do it. “There is the obsession that somehow, someday, they will beat the game.” (Big Book, )

Let’s think about this definition as it relates to alcoholism/addiction. What does “powerless” mean when it comes to alcoholism/addiction? The dictionary defines powerless as being without the power to do something or prevent something from happening. By Bart Ross - Recovery & Alumni Services Coordinator Step One: “We admitted we were powerless over alcohol – that our lives had become unmanageable.” (Big Book, )

Powerless over my addiction